What’s Playing on Your Record Player?

April 24, 2015

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts.” (Philippians 4:6-7)

Ok, so, have you ever read this passage... prayed this passage... meditated on it... wrote it out and stuck it to your bedroom mirror... and STILL FELT ANXIOUS? Anyone???

I think God showed me a little secret a few years ago and He’s highlighted it again this year. Bear with me a little, please, while I get to the point.

Are you Living or “Just Surviving”?

April 17, 2015

I have this friend that has the same debate with me often. It typically goes like this, “What’s the point of it all? Why can’t Jesus just end it all now so we can go to heaven?”

It’s a hard question to answer when you think about it because… I mean, life is hard, many people are suffering – wouldn’t we all prefer to be in heaven? This begs the question of whether life is meant to be “just surviving.”

Is the Orthodox Church for everyone?

April 2, 2015

I believe our Orthodox church is not for everyone.

I know that sounds arrogant, intolerant and insensitive of me, but just hear me out. Believe it or not, I am actually making that statement for the purpose of bringing people TO the Church, not to push people away.

The Orthodox Church is not for everyone. It isn’t for people who are just looking for entertainment. It isn’t for people who are lonely and just looking for some soothing words to make them feel good again. It isn’t for people who are looking for an emotional high to just make them feel close to God.

It just isn’t.

So who is it for then?

In the Synagogue with Jesus

March 27, 2015

I woke up this morning with a really heavy heart, overwhelmed by a lot of things. I could feel my Spirit longing to nourish himself with the word of God and I knew I just needed to vent out so much emotion to Jesus. I felt like a balloon about to pop!

Fortunately my friend the Holy Spirit pushed me to pop in His presence and not on my own, otherwise I would have sunk in a deep cycle of negativity and self-pity. Nothing feels better or more intimate than pouring your heart out to your God, raw emotions and all. After a few seconds of silence I begged the Holy Spirit to speak loudly to me, to hush all the noise in my head, and I opened my Bible.

How Long, O Lord?

March 20, 2015

I'll be honest; the past few weeks have been tough for me. Have you ever had one of those weeks when everything seems dim and nothing seems to go your way?

You're tired and lacking sleep. You forgot to pay a bill and now have to pay interest. Your friends are angry with you because you don’t have the time to sit and talk with them. Your family is dismayed at your inability to complete daily tasks at home. Your boss and coworkers are making you feel inferior. Your next assignment is due tomorrow and you have no idea how it will get done in time.

You feel exhausted and long to get away from everything…forever. And on top of all that, just when you don't need to add anything else to your plate, you feel that God isn't there either! You're tired and frustrated and you just want to complain and let out a loud SCREAM!

AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Made in Heaven

February 27, 2015

How many of us enter into marriage truly believing that marriages are “made in heaven”, as the idiom goes? We approach courting thinking we are prepared.

Education? Check. Career? Check. House? Check.

We then proudly oversell ourselves thinking we can independently fulfill another, and conversely, we also seek fulfillment in another. Once we believe we have found that fulfillment, we pledge our forever-love. Then come the wedding, the confetti, and the bouquet toss. But sooner or later, if God isn’t at the center of the marriage, the honeymoon is over.

A Lesson from the 21 Martyrs

February 20, 2015

Ever since the news broke out on Sunday of the beheading of twenty-one Coptic workers in Libya, there has been barrage of news links, Facebook statuses, and blog posts (sorry).

With the intent of informing myself, I've read through a lot of these and have landed in a state of complete bewilderment. It's a bit overwhelming.

How am I supposed to feel right now? Should I be mad that the video is being shared so carelessly? Should I be annoyed that the White House statement neglected to identify the victims as Christians? Should I rejoice that the Egyptian government responded by bombing Islamic State targets in Libya?

It's easy to respond to big questions like these almost automatically (e.g. yes. yes. I don't know) and to make them our focus, but I fear we are just missing the point.

Sweet Victory

February 6, 2015

There’s nothing like a good song to lift my spirits. Music is a very powerful thing, and to me… it’s how my heart worships. It’s the strongest way my spirit connects with God.

Now, if I were to tell you that hip hop is my favorite genre of music, you might think I’m crazy; but there is some seriously good Christian hip hop out there, and it’s a beautiful thing!

There’s one song in particular that I’ve been listening to (on repeat) for the past several weeks. It comes from the album Riseby Trip Lee (whose concert I just attended last night, and it was AWESOME!!). The song is called Sweet Victory.

Shame: Your Freedom or Your Prison?

January 23, 2015

Shortly after starting my Masters program, I was seeking to do something a little more to give back to the community; so I entered coaching school. For those who aren’t familiar with life coaching, it’s goal is to address everyday issues to help someone move forward from good to great – as opposed to therapy which aims to help people move from dysfunction to functional.

Utilizing my former psychology degree to expand into coaching, I noticed a common thread between many of my clients-- it’s that dirty little feeling we like to avoid and run away from whenever possible; that gremlin that forces us to cower in pain as reminders of our past shortcomings, sins, and faults come to light…SHAME!

Letting Go & Letting God

January 16, 2015

Anxiety. It’s something we all face. Whether it’s coming from work, or from school, or from marriage, or from money (or lack thereof), it’s something that everyone deals with. The consequences of having anxiety are well documented – hyperventilation, nausea, feeling loss of control, and feeling on edge. No one likes being anxious.

Anxiety results from our interpretation of situations. An assessment of a situation as threatening, damaging, or challenging, coupled with doubts over our ability to cope and respond in a manner that produces a desirable outcome can lead to anxiety. But often our interpretation of those situations is distorted – leading to misguided concern rather than the peace of God which surpasses all understanding.

“The servant of the Lord will be afraid only of his Master, while the man who does not yet fear Him is often scared by his own shadow.” St. John Climacus

Sanctify Ye A Fast

December 12, 2014

One spiritual discipline that I have encountered the most difficulty in maintaining during medical school has been FASTING. With the Fast of the Nativity upon us, I thought it an opportune time to share how medical school has affected my fasting.

Why do I fast on Wednesdays and Fridays?

Hot and Humid on Christmas?

December 5, 2014

For most of you, the journey to Christmas will be a cold one. I’ve been reading that parts of the USA have been received immense amounts of snow, much earlier than usual. Also, throughout Europe, it’s been a cold and wet winter so far as well.

But that isn’t a problem for me. That’s because I live in Sydney, Australia. And especially with the "climate change" that everyone’s talking about, it’s even hotter this year than usual. So all we can do is dream of having a “white Christmas.”

But here’s the thing: even though it doesn’t look like Christmas or feel like Christmas, it’s still Christmas.

God Who Heals

November 21, 2014

Do you ever get tired of waking up tired? Sounds like a silly question right? Well, about two months ago I decided that I was tired of waking up feeling like life was somehow too hard. I know in my head that, as a follower of Jesus, my life SHOULD look different, feel different, and make a difference, right?

But instead, I felt tired, distracted, and very broken. Where was the joy? The strength? The healing? I felt like I was missing something important, and that even though I might have had it once… I lost it, whatever IT was.

I struggled to pray, to read my Bible, or to serve othes in any capacity. In the brief moments I actually tried to pray, I had nothing to say. All I could muster up was someting along the lines of: “Lord, I need healing – I don’t know why I feel so defeated, like life is too hard and I’m too broken to do anything about it…I need to be healed.”

That single prayer carried me for what seemed like forever.

Why Have Faith?

November 7, 2014

How would you answer that question? That's not an easy one.

What's the purpose of having faith in God? What does it do for my life? Does faith mean that life will be easy and without challenges? Why have faith when my life continues to be difficult and full of obstacles?

When I got sick and spent time in the ICU, I felt my faith shake. I wondered how God could allow someone with faith to nearly die from an eating disorder. I remember asking the nurses and doctors why I wasn't getting any better, but no one had an answer. I remember asking my family and church community why my condition was so hopeless, and they told me that God had a plan. But what plan? I had faith in God all my life, so why wasn't He intervening?!

Finding Joy in the Desert

October 31, 2014

When you’ve tasted the sweetness of the living water, there’s nothing more unbearable than the dryness of the desert.

I work harder, pleading for His presence, trying to push myself to find some sort of emotional connection to the words I have read over and over in my Bible. Somehow, I still leave feeling empty and unfulfilled. I feel like saying with Isaiah the prophet, “My eyes grew weak as I looked to the heavens” (Isaiah 38:14).

I guess it’s because somewhere along the way, I’ve slipped into thinking that when I can’t feel God, He has abandoned me. In other words, I equate God’s silence with God’s absence.

But is that really the case?

Seriously Disturbed, Joyfully Content

October 24, 2014

A typical Saturday morning in our house includes my two young boys (incapable of sleeping past 7 am) fighting over who gets to do something first, who plays with what toy, who gets the blue plate at breakfast, or something like that… I admittedly started tuning them out. Meanwhile, in my room, I’m washing my face and making frown-y faces in the mirror remembering what I looked like in the “good ole days” (in actuality, I was unhappy with the way I looked back then too). My husband is similarly groaning at the fact that it’s so early … on a Saturday.

I volunteer in the children’s program at my church where we have been discussing contentment this month, so the topic has been at the forefront of my mind. Specifically, what’s robbing us of our contentment?

A "Not Applicable" Promise

October 17, 2014

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." (Psalm 34:18)

That's the promise God gave me at the start of 2014. And to be honest, I spent most of this year confused by it.

We’ve heard quite a bit about the encouraging promises of God on this blog, but when I looked at my promise on January 1, I was a little disappointed. Others were given promises of hope, of victory, and of slicing through bronze while I was given a promise that was seemingly "not applicable" to me. I had no idea what to expect in 2014.

Living With Intention

September 26, 2014

Imagine getting on a sailboat, sailing for 25 years and then stopping all of a sudden. You've forgotten where you came from… you have no idea where you are… and you don’t have a clue where you’re going. All this time you’ve sailed aimlessly with no clear direction and now it’s too late to do anything about it.

Unfortunately, that’s life for too many of us. In a generation where distractions couldn't be more numerous, this is where many of us find ourselves.

But that is NOT what God wants for us. That’s because unlike us, God is intentional. Everything He does is intentional and done with purpose. Everything.

“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” (Proverbs 29:18)

A Little Piece of our Ocean

September 11, 2014

“What we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But if that drop was not in the ocean, I think the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.” – Mother Teresa

Just recently, I read an article that the Australian government is not giving up on its search for the mysterious Malaysian Airlines plane that disappeared earlier this year. When it first disappeared, I was one of the first people to sign up to help find the plane without ever leaving my home. Using satellites from a private company, I was given a piece of the ocean to search and mark anything I may see. When I was awake at night with my little one, I spent hours scouring the ocean to see if I could find any wreckage or signs of this missing plane.

Although this task kept me busy during the wee hours of the night, I never found anything. But it did teach our family a lesson to apply in our mission life: each one of us in this world is responsible for a little piece of our ocean.

The Struggle

August 29, 2014

Meet Mamma Freda. Mamma Freda is an elderly woman that I met during a recent trip to Kenya. She lives with a crippling pain in her left leg, unable to afford medication to alleviate the discomfort. The pain is so immense that it prevents her from daily tasks such as cooking; in fact when we saw her, she hadn’t eaten in three days because of the pain!

Despite that, she received us with a most cheerful countenance. She struggled to greet us – using a huge wooden rod to steady her step, simply overjoyed that we were there to share a short prayer with her.

I wish I could find the words to express the blessedness of this woman – nothing I am capable of writing will do justice to Mamma Freda and her faithfulness to God. She lived with a debilitating pain in her leg, but despite that, she walked long distances every single Sunday just to make it to church. And she always did it with a smile on her face.

With Mamma Freda before me as an example, I had to ask myself: do I ever struggle for my faith? Do I ever seek Christ when it isn’t convenient and easy? Do I ever sacrifice my comfort to be with God or do something for God?